I began writing this blog with no real topic in mind. It has been a process and a slow one. I wanted to document my move. My plan was to document the process, but it has occurred to me that until recently, the process had not reached much evolution. How do you write about something when you nothing? Of late, my process has seen some progress. The process will never end, and I have a lot to learn about this city, but why not start there? To this point, I have left very little room for engagement and wasn’t that the purpose from the start?
Let me start with the stereotypical New Yorker. You know, that person that doesn’t exist…
Ten misconstrued notions and lessons I’ve learned as a New York City newbie:
1. Sex and the City was full of shit!! Most girls do not walk around the city in stilettos. Are you nuts? We walk everywhere. I had to trade in most of my “city style” boots for flat ones when I moved here and suffer many many blisters.
2. The cost of living is NOT covered by increased salary. Employers expect that if you took the chance to move here, that’s on you. While median salary is higher in New York, an entry-level job will most likely not cover the apartment you envisioned. (All of those TV shows with young people in spacious apartments- they lied too).
3. All of those successful friends you will meet, at one point or another, also did whatever they could to survive.
4. Forget number 3. Broke is just a foreign concept to some people. Either they have no loans, or their parents were shelling out rent money for a while, but having absolutely nothing, you might as well have 5 heads.
5. New Yorkers dress to impress. This is false. Fashion is all around the city, of course, but see #1. Most New Yorkers, especially the younger crowd, dress for comfort. Jeans are way more frequently acceptable in the workplace than in smaller cities.
6. Living in New York City can be like living anywhere else. While living expenses are high, there are plenty of ways to save. Living Social deals, for one. Free events and unknown little restaurants, for another.
7. Similar to #6- Living in New York does not mean going out every night and shopping every day. For some reason, all of my friends think they need to save money to visit me. What do you think we do on the weekends? Because usually, it involves super cheap drink specials with friends, ordering food from Seamless and drinking wine with a movie at home. You know, like everywhere else in the world?
8. A notion I’ve never had, but thought I should throw in here. “New Yorkers are rude and think they are better than everyone else”. UNTRUE!! Some people are rude, just like everywhere, but for the most part, most New Yorkers have been new to the city at some point and are often willing to offer directions or advice if you just ask.
9. The notion is that New Yorkers take cabs everywhere and dress like rockstars when we do it. Lies. We stack ourselves like sausages into subway cars in the morning, scramble for open seats, and really only take cabs when there is no convenient way to do it otherwise.
10. I’ve mentioned that most people you will meet have struggled in similar ways. Embrace that. Most young people move to New York for similar reasons. Find commonalities. This city has a niche for everyone. Some where on this hustling, bustling island are the best friends you’ll ever meet. (Sex and the City didn’t lie about everything).
11. (I know. I said 10…)
Networking is bigger here than anywhere!! In a city so large and full of creative people, using your network and building a network is key, socially as well as in your career. People want to help other people, and most want to make new friends. We are all pretty friendly. Don’t be afraid to reach out.
I’ve learned many other things since I’ve been here, and I’m still job searching, networking, struggling, and making friends. I love to stay busy, and this city certainly gives me that. I’m happy and I’m miserable at the same time, but the process continues and each day life gets a little more normal.
